So I watched Top Five…

Ever wondered how many famous friends Chris Rock has? Ever wondered how many of these famous friends he can fit into one movie? If you answered yes to either of these questions, this movie is FOR YOU!

Okay, basic plot: Chris Rock stars as Andre Allen, a comedian who isn’t funny anymore and is trying to branch out and do more serious things, professionally…so basically Eddie Murphy. Oh and Rosaria Dawson plays a journalist interviewing Allen about his latest movie.

Okay here’s my problem with Chris Rock movies: Chris Rock is an amazing comedian – in my opinion, the best ever – but he isn’t a great actor. I want him to make movies but he should be behind the camera, writing the jokes or we shouldn’t be able to see his face like in Madagascar.

Okay, that being said, this movie is really funny. It feels like watching those intro videos they have just before a standup show where cameras follow the comic around and he just says random funny stuff. This movie has a plot but you (and Chris Rock and pretty much every other actor in this movie) will ignore it because all you want is for Chris Rock to start speaking so that you can start laughing.

Chris Rock’s character is apparently supposed to have a romance with Rosario Dawson’s character but I only know this because the script says so and not because the two actors have any sort of chemistry. The movie tries to create a ‘will they, won’t they’ kind of situation but after five minutes, you honestly don’t care because 1) you’re waiting for the next Chris Rock joke and 2) this isn’t the first time you watch a movie so there’s zero suspense.

This movie takes a few jabs at Tyler Perry movies (which I loved) but it’s ironic because this movie is basically a Tyler Perry movie but instead of it being about fitting as many famous black actors into a family, it’s about fitting a million black comedians into a script that has no place or need for them. This movie is basically The Expendables for black comedians. Do they belong in the script? No. Will they make you laugh? Yes. Okay, it’s exactly like The Expendables then.

This movie tries to address the current mentality of pop culture with an obvious Kardashian ripoff and comments about celebrity and the limits set on entertainers by their own success but I think these topics are above this movie’s pay-grade and they’re never really handled with the wit or humour necessary to leave a lasting impression.

Another interesting point this movie raises is that films have subconscious hints and cues in them, in order to make audiences do things without their knowledge. I found this interesting because this movie refers to Cinderella quite a bit and there’s a new Cinderella movie that just got released; is this movie the reason I went to see Cinderella? Luckily I didn’t fall for this Jedi mind trick…but that’s only because I watched Cinderella the day before this movie.

Overall, this movie is pretty funny and has a lot of big name cameos that will be fun to see. I don’t think it’s worth a trip to the cinema, just watch a Chris Rock standup show – you seriously won’t be able to tell the difference. 6/10